Is One Type of Friendship Really Better Than Another? | #ThisGirlEats

We spend our whole lives forming relationships. Even if you don’t consider yourself a particularly sociable individual (me, lol) it’s impossible to go through life without new relationships popping up and, in some cases, becoming great friendships.

You go to work, you meet new colleagues. You date someone, you’re introduced to a new circle of peers. You move house, you’re living with new neighbours. If we’re lucky, new friendships develop too and that kinda makes it worthwhile – right?

But when I started thinking about the different friendships I’ve made throughout my life, both past and present, and just how unique they all are, I asked myself something – is one type of friendship “better” than others?

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Some people truly are BFFs – joined at the hip, constantly messaging, know intricate details of each other’s lives. It looks pretty good. I’ve definitely had friends like this in my life but, right now, I wouldn’t say I’ve got this kind of friendship with anyone. That sounds a little sad, doesn’t it? But, then again, is living in each other’s pockets really that great?

I once lived with a friend at uni and thought we were as close as it gets. Literally living together. Sharing a bathroom, cooking dinner for each other, taking turns washing up… It was great! But a little way down the line something irreparable happened between us (soz, that’s a whooole other story!) and it all came to a very sudden, very definitive halt. That was that. So much for closeness, huh?

I’ve got friends I hardly ever see, or even speak to. We go months without even DMing and meeting up is an incredibly rare occasion. The ties that bound us together in the past – going to school together and growing up in the same town – have long faded, and a sad distance took their place. But when we do hang out the connection is amazing, like no time has passed at all. It’s familiar, it’s easy; irreplaceable, even. When I think about it, these friendships have really stood their ground.

But what about the friendships that don’t even really belong to us? Ones brought together by work, or perhaps those of your other half. These friendships start off because outside forces shoved you together, but you’ve stuck around because a genuine friendship has blossomed beyond whatever catalyst started it all. For me, these are usually people I wouldn’t naturally be drawn towards; because of that, these friendships are the most fun. They reveal parts of you that you never knew, bring out a personality you might not expect and force you to live outside of your usual circle.

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These days, some friendships only exist in a virtual world, glued together by social media and smartphones. I’ve heard people say online friends aren’t “real friends” but many of us bloggers know that the online community can sometimes be more supportive than the actual living, breathing people in your life. Let’s be honest, we spend most of our lives online now anyway, so it’s only to be expected.

Thinking through all these different types of friendships – pretty much all of which I’ve experienced at one time or another – has led me to at least one conclusion: there might be best friends in life, but there’s no such thing as a best friendship.

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